Friday 7 March 2014

Essay Draft 1

Is mankind responsible for the collapse of biodiversity?

Today, as compared to a few decades ago, we have witnessed the collapse of biodiversity becoming more evident. According to the Millenium Ecosystem Assessment (March 2005), there is a substantial and largely irreversible loss in the diversity of life on Earth, with some 10-30% of the mammal, bird and amphibian species threatened with extinction, due to human actions. One cause that is heavily tied to this problem is the rapid globalisation in the world. Rapid globalisation involves the movement of people across countries and as a result, it makes the world more integrated through the spread of ideas and cultures. Globalisation brings about further development of human activities such as the increase in number of industrialised area built, which resulted in a loss of biodiversity. I agree that globalisation has led to the collapse of diversity. However, mankind has been aware of this problem and are doing their best to alleviate this problem. Governments worldwide were committed to the Millennium Development Goals of ensuring environmental sustainability Environmental Sustainability by achieving a significant reduction of the current rate of biodiversity loss at the global, regional and national level to mitigate poverty and benefit all lives on Earth.

Due to industrialisation, pollution has become one of the greatest threats to global biodiversity. This is particularly observed in Shanghai, China. Since 1970s, Shanghai has been experiencing rapid expansion and urbanization. This was due to the low cost of production in Shanghai, which works as an incentive for many foreigners to set up their companies there. Many job opportunities were given to the Chinese local and more knowledge and skills could be acquired from the foreign companies. As a result of its rapid expansion, shanghai is also known for its bad pollution. From 1991 to 2010, industrial waste gas emission has been increasing at 43.1 billion cubic metres annually (Cui and Shi, 2012). Besides human being, marine animals and plants are also vulnerable to air pollution. There were researchers who concluded that China's plants and food crops are affected by toxic air (Discovery News, 2012). With all these ongoing problems, China has implemented several solutions to reduce the loss of biodiversity due to industrialisation.

The first solution is to cut down dependence on coal. According to Environment News Network (2013), the construction of new coal-fired plants is prohibited, and replaced by 18 synthetic natural gas (SNG) plants. Reducing the number of coal-fired plants can reduce air pollution since burning of coal contributes to harmful air particulates. However, this is a short-time solution. Moreover, although SNG can help to reduce particulate air pollution, the process of mining coal and converting it to natural gas can yield 36 percent to 82 percent more greenhouse gas emissions than burning coal directly (Enviroment News Network, 2013). Shutting down the coal-fired plants is also not sufficient enough to mitigate this pollution problem because emission from vehicles, shipyards and aircraft also contribute to air pollution in Shanghai especially after Shanghai became an international transport hub.

A second solution was implemented by Hanergy, the largest non-state-owned enterprise of clean energy power generation in China, which focuses on hydropower and solar power as alternatives (The Chinese Dream, ). The Shanghai Tower, upon completion in 2014, will serve to reduce energy usage as wind turbines are built at the top of the tower and electricity generated will run the exterior light. We can see that with clean energy power generation, industries have alternative sources to run the plants instead of using coal. Less coal would be burnt, giving rise to a cleaner Shanghai. However, there are limitations to this implementation. Other sources of energy like hydropower and solar power requires much capital to operate. It also takes a long time to start these operations, which is not effective to solve the imminent air pollution problem in Shanghai.

The loss of biodiversity in China is largely attributed to air and water pollution. The Chinese government has been targeting the root of the problem by controlling air pollution. However, air pollution still exists till now and this means that the loss of biodiversity is still not controlled. On top of solving the root of the problem, the Chinese can also preserve some of the rare plant species by planting them indoors, but continue to provide the same conditions needed. With less exposure to toxic air, the plants will be healthier. Preventing the loss of biodiversity  requires a lot of time and combination of many solutions.

In conclusion, globalisation drives rapid expansion and industrialisation in China, sacrificing Biodiversity at the same time. However, mankind has been responsible for their actions and has made the effort to solve the problem.  Unfortunately, loss of biodiversity due to air pollution is happening at a faster rate than our actions to deal with the problems. Therefore, it is really hard to stop the loss of biodiversity but what we can do, is to slow down the pace of losing our biodiversity.

References
Biodiversity.sg (2014).  Anthropic Impacts And Biodiversity. Retrieved from http://www.biodiversity.sg/biodiversity-information/view-slideshow/anthropic-impacts-and-biodiversity/pollution-and-biodiversity/

Discovery News (2013). China’s Urban Air Kills Rural Plants. Retrieved from: http://news.discovery.com/earth/plants/china-urban-air-kills-rurual-plants-130118.htm

Environmental News Network (2013). China’s Solution for Combating Air Pollution? Convert Coal to Synthetic Natural Gas. Retrieved from: http://www.enn.com/environmental_policy/article/46681

Global issues (2014). Loss of Biodiversity and Extinctions. Retrieved from http://www.globalissues.org/article/171/loss-of-biodiversity-and-extinctions#OtherRelatedGlobalIssuesandCauses

Global times (2013). Shanghai publishes clean air action plan. Retrieved from:  http://www.globaltimes.cn/content/818788.shtml#.UxiaCPmSxps

Massachusetts Institute of Technology, MIT (2014). Mission 2015: Biodiversity. Retrieved from http://web.mit.edu/12.000/www/m2015/2015/solutions_for_industrial_pollution.html

The Chinese Dream (n.d.). Pollution. Retrieved from: http://china2012.bizjournalism.org/?page_id=229

Cui and Shi (25 October 2012). Urbanisation and its environmental effects in Shanghai, China. Elsevier. Retrieved from
http://www.iufn.org/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/Cui-2012-Urbanization-and-its-environmental-effects-in-Shanghai.pdf



2 comments:

  1. Hello. Shalen, Samuel and Kelly here. We're going to comment on your essay. Hope it helps (:

    1. No reference back to Goldin.

    2. Main focus of the essay is clear from the start.

    3. Background information given and contextualised

    4. Background information is specific enough in relation to impact of people and problem.

    5. Expert opinions present.

    6. Thesis statement is clear.

    7. Clear solutions were presented.

    8. Writer showed how solution address the problem directly

    9. Writer make clear who can and should initiate the solution directly

    10. Potential benefits present.

    11. Expert opinion present

    12. Potential of solving the problem evaluated.

    13. Ideas are cohesive

    14. Citations are relevant and effective

    15. Some in-text citations not completed. i.e. the year is not written.

    16. End-of-text citations reflected an understanding of the APA style

    17. No major problem for language

    18. 7

    19. 7

    20. 7

    Hope it helps (:

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hi Jocelyn!

    Sorry for the late feedback, I'll try to help as much as possible!

    Structure of the essay is fine to me and your citations are great! I think you're not answering your own topic question in the first place! I think you can maybe change 'mankind' to globalisation instead.

    I'll try to correct some of the language mistakes but note that my language is not fantastic as well so you make the judgement!

    First paragraph
    ...there is a substantial and largely...
    ..mammal bird and amphibian species.. (singular i think)
    ... increase in industrial areas being built... (that sentence might be too long, you might want to take the last part to the next sentence)
    ... (repeated extra Environmental Sustainability)

    Second paragraph
    ... 1970s, Shanghai had been ...
    ... which worked as an incentive...
    ... to the local Chinese..
    Caps Shanghai
    Besides human beings...

    Third paragraph
    prohibited and replaced (without the comma)
    (think short term solution would be more appropriate)
    Environment (spelling)
    not sufficient to (enough = sufficient)
    shipyards and aircrafts (plural)
    ..also contributes to air pollution

    Fourth paragraph
    Less coal will be burnt

    Fifth paragraph
    air pollution still exists today
    .. time and a combination of many (or separate the sentence, strucutre seems a bit wrong to me)

    Sixth paragraph
    sacrificing biodiversity
    (second sentence first part seems redundant, one suggestion: However, efforts have been made by mankind over the years to solve this issue.)

    Hope this helps! I think your essay is on the right track, keep it up!

    Kenny

    ReplyDelete